Facebook and Twitter Basics: Newbie Social Networking skills

Now I get it!

I went to Matt Bacak’s Marketing Madness #16 in Atlanta, Georgia this weekend.

Now, I am listening to Adam Urbanski, Mari Smith and Carrie Wilkerson on a phone call as I started to write this blog post.

I get some very basic things that I did not get before. I now get the big picture. That is why it is so important to go to such events. You get to see yourself as part of the marketplace and share ideas. I only met one person that I would consider a competitor and she is an awesome lady that I learnt a lot from. So, no threat there in any way shape or form. Also, she learnt a lot from me.

I get that I am an Internet marketer because I have a website and I am trying to sell my goods and services online. I have met so many other people online that do not get this very key point. My online relationships are as sacred as my offline relationships.

You maximize social networking like Twitter and Facebook by approaching it this way:

1.  You have entered into the room at a cocktail party (Twitter and Facebook);

2.  You say hello to others (add or invite followers),

3.  Read their business card (click on their website on twitter and see what they are about; read their bio on Facebook and be interested in them)

4.  Notice the few that you are interested in taking your knowledge of them to the next level (have a conversation with them)

5.  Maintain a relationship with them (keep exchanging notes on Facebook and Twitter – respond to them.

6.  Be interested and be interesting (share information and goodies with them.)

7.  Appreciate your sacred relationship with them (do not pimp followers out or ignore them or take them for granted in any way);

8.  Don’t just walk up to someone at a party and ask them for a job (do not sell something to them immediately. Give something first and infuse your communication with a lot of good vibes, quotes, interesting things you are doing. Let your sales tweets or updates on Facebook be one out of ten as a good rule of thumb.)

9.  Introduce your newly met friends with one another so you can have more connections and interaction (connect your Facebook and Twitter accounts so that you are consistent and you save time).

10. Be polite and say hello and goodnight to those at the cocktail party (say good morning and good night on Twitter and Facebook and tell us what is going on in your life. It makes you more human.

11.  Take your conversation to the next level. Plan to see each other again. (Connect in real life with some of your connections on Facebook and Twitter by going to Tweetups and Meet ups. Better yet, make one happen.)

12.  Celebrate your new friends lives with them. Make a note of people’s birthdays and wish them “Happy Birthday.” (Facebook will tell you your friend’s birthdays. Do not miss out on that. Be sure to wish them blessings on those special days.)

Enjoy your new found relationships. They are sacred.

Also, you can follow me:

Twitter: CoachIyabo

Facebook: Iyabo Asani

I look forward to connecting with you.

The Pursuit of Happiness

The pursuit of happiness is actually a misnomer. This term from the US constitution is often quoted. The constitutional foundation of the United States is built on the premise that we are ensured the freedom to pursue happiness. However, in 1776, the term pursuit meant to practice something regularly.

The traditional definition of pursuit of happiness gives the image of a horse and carrot stick where happiness is out there somewhere and we may find it but we should keep chasing after it. If this is the definition of the pursuit of happiness, it would be self defeating as we would never get it.

The pursuit of happiness is a preoccupation for many of us and has probably been since the dawn of mankind. People feel that when they get married, win the lottery, lose 50 pounds, then they would be happy.

For many, happiness always feels like something in the future. Well, we all hear that we should not think this way. So how should we think about happiness?

If we replace pursuing happiness with practicing happiness, it changes our whole understanding. It means happiness is something that we can actually do instead of just perpetually chasing after it. Practicing happiness, however, is a daily, moment by moment choice that each of can make and turn into a habit.

The best way to think about happiness is to think about it as something you can control and achieve and that it is a possibility that can happen right now, no matter what is going on around you. Happiness is pursuable: It just takes practice. Practicing happiness, however, is a daily, moment by moment choice that each of can make and turn into a habit.

How do you practice happiness?

What does happiness mean to you?

Podcasts on your Inner Genius

Here on this blog, I ask a powerful question each day. This question is designed to awaken and nuture your Inner Genius. Each day, there is a corresponding podcast listed in Itunes that covers the question asked here on the blog. To subscribe to this podcast visit your Itunes store and look for Iyabo Asani. I am right there. Thanks for listening.

This is the audio Introduction to my podcast:

The Blame Game.

Someone dear to me who shall remain unnamed was in town visiting and left today. It snowed yesterday and our big airport in Atlanta was having some flight delays so her flight was delayed. So she decided to get to the airport in anticipation of the new flight time.

Guess what? Here was the conversation.

“Can you belive these crazy people?” she said.

“What happened? Did you miss the flight” I asked.

“No, I did not miss my flight. These crazy people closed out the baggage check in and now I have to carry two heavy peices of luggage though this busy terminal to catch the flight. This is too much to deal with.”

I got really quiet.

“What is wrong with them? Why did they close the baggage terminal down? I was only five minutes late. Why will they not cooperate with me.”

I started laughing. I could no longer hold it in. She started laughing. She said, “There you go again. Miss-I-am-a-coach-and-I-have-to-walk-my-talk.”

“Leave me alone. I do not want to be bothered with you,” she laughed.

She knew that I would not let her indulge in that fantasy. It was no one else’s fault but squarely her responsibility. She took a gamble about the plane baggage kiosk being open later because the flight was delayed.

This event had me thinking about how often we place blame, either on others or on ourselves.

We abuse “blame.” Blame is a minimally useful emotion and thought pattern. It only helps us identify patterns that are not working for us. However, the part we skip is that many of us do not realize that it is a time to respect the information of the patterns that are not working for us and go ahead and take responsibility for our thoughts and corresponding actions.

So do not bother to engage in blame. Blame is a very tough emotion to let go of. The more you engage in the blame game the more entrenched you get in it.  Many of our wonderful parents unwittingly taught us patterns of blame in an attempt to protect us from making mistakes.  But placing blame squarely on one’s shoulders has never stopped a problem. Blame makes you feel guilty and so you start solution seeking just to alleviate those feelings of blame.  Blame feels heavy and hard. There is a component of blame that is about punishment as the energy to stop the same problem from happening again.

If you try to create a solution to a problem from the basis of blame, the inception of your solution is off base and will not yield the most profitable result. You may end up putting a band-aid on the problem but you will never change the core issue if you function in blame.

It is important in your personal life and in your business to begin to create solutions from observing the issue requiring a solution from multiple perspectives. None of those perspectives include blame.

Please be clear. I fully believe in taking responsibility. However, in taking responsiblity for an issue, be kind with yourself.

Being kind to yourself does not mean that you are not aware of the full ramifications of the event and possible future consequences. Being kind to yourself merely means that there is no need to beat yourself over the head about and punish yourself mentally about the situation.

What  often happens, like with my dear friend in this example, you become so averse to personal blame because historically, you found that it is so awful to blame your self. You self-flagellate so much, that you react by blaming someone totally blameless in the situation. You can see the folly of this.

Did this scenario create a new solution for my friend the next time she has a plane to catch?

No.

Obviously this pattern will continue to repeat itself unless it was just a one time fluke.

Do you see this type of pattern in your life?

Can you feel the difference between taking responsibility and placing blame?

How can you be more authentic and create genius solutions to your business issues by taking responsibility?

Please leave a comment.

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