25 Random things you did not know about me!
January 21, 2009 by Iyabo Asani
Filed under Belonging
Tia Singh of Inspired by Fun coaching tagged me for this one and I will do it because she is awesome. She is in my mastermind group and my fellow coach.
* If I tagged you, it’s because I’d love to know more about you.* And if I didn’t tag you it’s cos I ran out of 25 tags 
but will do another one soon!
Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, ideally, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged, including the person who tagged you.
Only play if it’s fun for you and you want to. That’s my real official rule. 
1. I have never done drugs. I have never even smoked a joint. I love red wine though. I knew better than to start on drugs as I do have some addictive tendencies. Like chocolate, legal shows on tv and my Macbook.
2. I am married to Mr. Adrian Monk, the character on the TV show Monk. Mr. Monk has obsessive-compulsive disorder. Well, my husband, Femi, is almost Mr. Monk energetically. So each night, we watch Monk before we go to sleep so we can laugh and go to bed. I drive my husband crazy because, um…. Let us just say, I am not quite as organized as he is. I am not a slob but I am not a neat freak either.
3. My father was atheist and my mother was agnostic so, growing up, I never ever went to church except for funerals and weddings. I was born and raised in Nigeria where these terms were unheard of there. Everyone there is either Christian, Muslim or follow an earth religion. My parents said there is no spiritual dimension to life. So I felt like a very strange duck. When I was about seven or eight, I was watching a tele-evangelist on TV one Sunday afternoon. So I got myself “saved.” I walked down the carpet in my home, down the aisle, to the TV and got salvation. I would try and walk around all perfect and holy, trying to monitor all my thoughts and promising God how good I would be. By Tuesday afternoon, I would be “hell bound on wheels” as I was misbehavin’ and back to my old ways. Well, Sunday, the same thing would happen all over again. This went on until I came to the States when I was sixteen and started attending church regularly. Talk about being confused!
4. When I came the the US as a teenager, I started going to church and consistently observing my faith at last. Guess what I discovered? I hate churchianity! Hate it! Love Christianity but hate churchianity.
5. I am a closet LOA and Universal Law follower. There, it is out. O boy! What will happen if my brother and sister read this? O, there is that feeling again that I am “hell bound on wheels.” When I discovered LOA, I would listen to Abraham-Hicks material and “repent” afterward. Now, I blend it all. The more I study all this stuff, the more I see that most of it is all the same, just a different perspective. I love it. I am in complete harmony with it. I still worry what my pastors and my family would say but it does not stop me from being who I am and expressing it well too. I guess they will get over it.
6. I bit my nails until I was about 30 years old and started getting weekly manicures. All my life, I had bitten my nails and cuticles but no matter what, I could not stop biting my nails even when I came to this country and found that bitter stuff that you paint on your nails. Someone prayed for me and gave me a gift certificate to get my nails done and that is how I stopped. I still bite my cuticles though.
7. I have an affinity for languages although I only speak two and various dialects of both. I speak English and Yoruba and pidgin English and broken Yoruba. I cannot read Yoruba. My relationship with words is very different than most people. I taste words on my tongue as they roll off my lips. I sense words. I feel the vibration of words easily. Some words are yummy, some are tasty, some are holy. I am easily seduced by the deliciousness of a word and sometimes it feels as is a particular word resides deep within me. I just enjoy engaging and interacting with words.
9. My father passed away on my husband’s birthday.
10. My husband was the only one with my mom as he watched her make her transition when she passed away.
11. My husband went all the way to Nigeria to see his mom on a whim. He had not seen her in a few years. She died four days after he got back. What is up with this guy and dead parents? All the death we have experienced together makes us even closer to each other. We understand how fragile life is and how precious an experience it is to love another human being.
12. I used to be very scared of children. I did not understand them and they made me feel nervous. It took some years, but I worked through it and I love children now. I still cannot handle huge classrooms of them but I love engaging with them one on one. I still want to have kids.
13. I am fascinated with the fact that my mother is half Jewish. Her paternal grandfather was a Jewish Rabbi. I want to know that side of my heritage but I have no way to figure that out.
14. I am an avid reader. I love discovering young African writers that write about cross cultural experiences. I always have my nose in a book. It is pure escapism for me.
15. I have a problem with clothes. On my “off” days, I cannot match clothes or remember what goes with what. I am not the sharpest dresser and when I feel this way, I put on clashing colors and clashing patterns. This is fine when I am sitting around at home but I will even go to church that way, every now and then. My husband takes it upon himself to be my “appearance inspector.” Thank God for him. I have seen some pictures that make me cringe. I am not sure what this is about. Sometimes I can put myself together very well. But, other times, about 40 percent of the time, you would look at me and wonder what my problem is.
15. I am absolutely fearless about public speaking. I have spoken before a crowd of 5,000 plus people non-nonplussed. I do not have an appreciation for people that fear public speaking because I by passed that one with this gift. Now, is this not an interesting item compared to item number 15. Also as I re-read this I realize that what I do when I have to speak publicly is sink into the vibration of the words which is really easy for me to do and that is my focus and that is why I am not afraid of speaking publicly. Wow! Amazing.
16. I love hand made pottery and hand woven baskets. I love any kind of artistic expression. I feel a connection to the person that made it and make up imaginary stories in my head about the artists.
17. I am a hand lotion freak. I have so many bottles and tubes of lotion and I am constantly “lubing up.” I cannot stand dry hands. I am very obsessive about this. If you want to torture me, take away all my lotion.
19. I was, and still am, absolutely in love with my father. He was a wonderful and loving father and husband I believe this is why I was able to select a loving husband as well.
20. I collect clivia plants. Clivias are originally from South Africa and they are related to orchids. They bloom only once a year. They are pretty rare and expensive and require very little maintenance. My sister got me hooked.
21. When I was a very young child I ran into my brother carrying a boiling pot of water and the entire contents of the pot fell on my chest. I was rushed to the hospital and they started burn treatments on me. The next day, my father killed a pig and sliced the fat parts thinly and each day he would rub the pork fat on my chest and wrap thin slices on my chest for a few hours. He was the only one I would allow around me at this time and he was the only one that I would allow to treat my burns. This was the local way of healing burns. I do not have a single scar today. Years later, a university here in the US did a study and said that pork fat was an effective burn remedy. I am very grateful that I am not scared by the burns.
22. I grew up with the musician Sade. Her father and my father were friends and I met her when she was in fashion school and came to Nigeria to visit her father for a few months. I was probably about ten years old. I kept in touch with her over the years and she was a very popular singer for a couple of years before I even realized it was her. She had a concert in Washington, DC in the late eighties when I was in law school and my best friend, Anita and I went to see her. Anita did not believe that I knew Sade so she dared me to send her a note. I sent her a note and by the end of the show, the security guards came to get me. I spent the evening with her. It was wild. We literally stayed up and talked to dawn about her father who had recently passed away. She is even more lovely as a person than her music. Truly, she is a gem.
23. I am very passionate about aromatherapy and herbs as healing agents. I always have essential oils diffusing anywhere I am. Drives Mr. Monk crazy! Any smell other than clean air bothers him.
24. I am very clear that my purpose is in helping others. I am very loving and I always see the broader energy of others. Before, I used to assume that this meant that I should “rescue” them. Now, I am more aware of the value of that gift within me and that is why I went to coaching school. I went to coaching school to find out how to separate my “rescue” inclinations from just being there for others and being supportive. As I got “it,” I discovered my ability to reflecting to others how wonderful they already are. My entire coaching practice is built around that. So really, here is a secret. I do not work. I just play and have fun all day and the money rolls in.
25. I am completely tone deaf. I cannot carry a tune or sing yet I am well educated in classical music and even had the gall to take voice classes from a famed voice coach when I first came to this country. I think I thought I just had to be trained. That teacher almost passed out when she heard my screeches. I still screech and I think that I have finally accepted that I probably will not sing like Aretha Franklin in this lifetime.
Wow, this was a great exercise. I feel like I gathered all my scattered parts and put them together to make a mosaic of my life and who I am. Ahh, mosaic. Can you taste that word – it has smoothness to it. I learned something from this: I like myself. I am glad I know me.
OK, the twenty five other people that I am tagging here are as follows:
1. Tia Singh. The Fun and Inspired Coach.
2. Jeanette Maw. The most amazing Law of Attraction Vibrational Manager Coach. Truly Amazing. My personal guru.
3. Wendy Y Bailey. The Group Mastery Leader for Coaches. We share the same birthday. How kwel is that?
4. Tinu Abayomi-Paul. Her Royal Majesty, the Free Traffic Tips SEO Guru. We bow at your feet.
5. Trish Jones. The most kind hearted person ever. Web Guru and Major Woman of Influence. Thank you for all. She designs businesses from the heart of her technical skills.
6. Bassey Ikpi. Poet Extraordinaire. Toured with Def Poetry Jam. Presented at the NAACP Inauguration Ball just a couple of days ago.
7. Beverly Mahone. Baby Boomer Diva.
8. Kerrie McElvaine. The most awesome and coolest fish tank creator!
9. Ron Hudson. Mr. Influence and Mr. Persuasion.
10. Kim Falconer. World renowned Fantasy Author and Astrologer.
11. Lola Fayemi. The most amazing Energy healer and coach there is.
12. Gwen Thibeaux. Our very own motivational speaker and author.
13. Melody Campbell. The Most Exceptional Small Business Guru and Diva. This lady knows her stuff. My mentor.
14. Demi Langford. This woman attracts money like flies.
15. Karen Swim. She has a romance going on with words and she hires out her words.
16. Jim Smith. The happiest guy on the planet. The happiness coach.
17. Latara Ham-Ying. The VA extraordinaire.
18. Sophie B. President. A real live soap maker.
19. Rinatta Paries. Amazing Love Coach. Hire her. She is amazing.
20. Judy Kinney. The Coach for Lesbian and bi-sexual women.
21. Cd Vann. The Sohobiztube.com lady. Social networking connection builder.
22. Travis Webb. The only musician and body guard on the social networking planet. Awesome musician.
23. Pam Slim. A great coach and author that gets you out of cubicle nation into your own nation.
24. Sarah Stuart. The Imagination Dreamer.
25. Karen McMillian. The Conscious Living Coach.
OK, that is it. This is a lovely exercise. It was so nice getting into me and saying what would I want others to know.
Thanks for joining me.
Karen Swim on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 2:28 pm
Iyabo, one of the things I love about these memes is the fun things you learn about others in the blogosphere. Thank you so much for opening up and sharing so generously of yourself. I loved learning more about your background and your journey from there to now. You are truly a loving purpose and within 5 minutes of interacting with you, it is clear that you absolutely are living your destiny!
Karen Swim’s last blog post..At Last
Tia Singh aka @TiaSparkles on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 2:59 pm
This is such a great idea to post it on your blog!!! Thank you for tagging me and inspiring me to make a blog post out of mine too – fantastic! Wow, how amazing to peep into your life in Nigeria, your friendship with Sade, the miraculous burn cure, the nail biting (haha me too), the public speaking – you go girl. And Mr Monk – still laughing about that one
You are awesome. xx
Tia Singh aka @TiaSparkles’s last blog post..As you BE, so shall you SEE – A new Year Story
Love Coach Rinatta on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 3:15 pm
Iyabo, so many things I didn’t know about you! I especially like the clothing and lotion issues
Thanks for the laugh on that. And I love your relationship with words. Thanks for tagging me and for the nice words 
. I am on it.
Love Coach Rinatta’s last blog post..How To Bring a Marriage Back From the Brink of Divorce ~ or a Relationship Back From the Brink of a BreakUp
kerri McElvaine on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 4:47 pm
Thanks Iyabo, for tagging me. You ask what is up with Femi and your Mother abd Father? Maybe he has in him a spirit that connects with those who are ready to leave this life, but who are still hanging on until their loved ones can come to peace/have accepted with their impending loss. Maybe there is something about him that lets them know, ‘it is ok, you can go now, I have it all under control’. You really are truly blessed to be with him.
Shola on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 6:30 pm
Thanks for sharing. One thing we might have had in common was biting of nails, but I guess not anymore
.
This motivated me today that I got some colleagues together at work and we started sharing things about each other that we didn’t know.
Overall, it was great therapy.
kerri McElvaine on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 6:39 pm
1. I am adopted. My mother gave me up so I could have a better life. It took 3months for my real family to find me, and I am truly, forever grateful to them for that. I have had the best life and childhood I could have ever imagined. I used to resent, subconsciously, my mother for ‘giving me away’, but now, I thank her for it. It took many years of therapy to finally come to this reaization, but there you have it!
2. I am addicted to many things, whether real or ‘fake’, whether legal or illegal. I consider it ’self-medication’ instead of being on a perscription anti-depressant or mood sabilizer or some other junk that we don’t REALLY know how it works. I find that moderation is the key, and yes, its a difficult line to walk. In my past, I have done every illegal drug there is to do, some good, some bad. With my highly addictive personality, I find strength in the fact that I CAN say no, I do know when to quit, and, more important, I know the difference and have the forsight to distinguish between which ones could lead to my peril so I never do them again.
3. My Mother is a devout Catholic and we went to church every sunday, and bible school and all of that. I believed in all of it. I was ‘all in’. I know exactly when I lost my faith in Catholicism and religion in general. It was with the passing of my grandfather, my Dad’s dad. He had gotten lung cancer. He was pretty old, like 60 something? He was due for a routine physical and they found a spot on his lung. He drank a beer and amoked a cigar pretty much daily but the docs were optimistic. The treatment didn’t work. We flew him up to Mississippi from Florida and went to see him at the hospital. When I saw him, I thought we were in the wrong room. He looked completely different, his dark tan was gone, you could see right through him! His hair was gone, he was all drawn, he was a skeleton. I was showing horses at the time and I will never forget this…he said “aww Kerri, I saw you win your first blue ribbon, you were ridding Pegasus and you looked so beautiful” he was hallucinating from the pain meds. As my father and I were leaving the hospital(my mom and sis were walking ahed of us), I asked my Dad if Grandpa would be ok? He said he didn’t know. I told him “well he will be just fine, I have faith and been praying and God just would not let someone so special, so loved, go away”, I TRULY BELIEVED THIS WITH EVERY OUNCE OF MY BEING!!! That night we were staying at my parent’s friend’s lake house and the next morning my parents called us out to the backyard and told you Grandpa had died that night. WHY?WHY?WHY? To this day it is hard for me to talk/write about. I have death issues, not with myself, but with loved ones dying. Why did we not frigging stay with him? Why did we fly him up from fla only to let him die alone!!! I still have major issues with this. What an incredibly kind, gentle, understanding, and loving person. I could have never asked for a perfect Grandpa (not including my Mom’s parents!). But, yes, his passing truly shattered my faith and left it in my head and heart as a bunch of jagged garbage. I believe I was around 13 or 15 or so?
4. I DO believe in Mother Narure, she is my God and Goddess. I find peace with and in nature and consantly marvel at how delicate and intricate the world, this Mother Earth, is. How we, as human beings, automatically think She is something for us to tame, to conquer, to bound in barbed wire, to exploit Her resources and pollute her air, all in the name of ‘human improvement’ and ‘necessity’. I think She is very angry at us as She has shown a fraction of Her wrath with the increase in hurricanes, typhoons, extremes in temps, tornadoes, etc. If we do not treat hear right and continue on this fossil-fueled path o destruction, it will be the end….and sooner than we think….
5. My dogs are my children. As are my fish, tortoises, and corals. My dogs are just….I have no words…..
6. Being lost is what scares me the most. I cannot handle it. Of course it does not help that I have absolutely no sense of dirrection, but being lost by myself simply terrifies me. Along with public speaking!!
7. I think that taking care of fish and animals is what I was put on this earth to do. I find ultimate peace in working with them. I find that when I have to clean ponds in 20 degree weather when raining, I am not cold, nor wet, nor unhappy. I am elated.
8. I am a misanthrope. I find better company in fish, plants and animals than people. I do believe people are inherently evil, but the truly good are able to overcome that evil and elevate themselves to an actuall ‘higher’ being.
9. I take just ridiculously hot showers. Like to the point of red, red skin several minutes after being out and dried off. I love my hard shower pressure, it just rocks!! Its a hower and massage all-in-one. They are breif, not long, bout 10 minutes or so, but oohhh soooo hot!!
10. I love my vet. He is a true kindred spirit with a talent for understanding dogs and their people.
11. I really hate Atlanta traffic. I plan my life around it. I hate stitting in it for any length of time and will go though great measures to aviod it.
12. I really love my Mom but have always had a special bond with my father. It was always that way and I remember when my parents told me that he was adopted too. That may be part of the reason, but my Dad is just incredible. He amazes me with his books, his words are so eloquent, his teachings in history are so perfect. He is just, well, so cool!!
13. I am very happy that we have a new President and that he is Barack Obama. I feel he has a very tough, difficult job ahead of him and I hope he sticks to his guns without having to compromise too much. I hope for him all the best of luck and wisdom to keep on doin the right thing.
14. I miss my best friend. She moved back to Mississippi after9/11(amazing how that affected people!) and I miss her every day. I talk too her all the time, but its not the same.
15. I love my car. It is the very first car I brought brand, spankin new and paid for it all by myself. Mitzu Eclipses rock!!!! She is all mine now!
16. I love where I live. It is a 1 bedroom apt, but my backyard is the Chatahoochee Nature Preserve with endless trails and paths, right next to the river. I find much ofmy peace there and my dogs do too!
17. I quit bitting my nails because my mom said I could get my ears pierced if I did. I did, I was 12.
18. I have absolutely, possitively no sense of style. Even IF I do find something that looks good or right on me my mom and usually my BFF will say, that was outta style 6 years ago!! Its kinda sad, actually.
19. I love music! Singing, playing the piano, clarinet, sax, trumpet! Love, Love, Love music!! Music defines ones spirit, mood, state of mind.
20. I have an unhealthy relationship with food.
21. I have had a long-term relationship ever since I was in high school. Each lasting from 4-5 years and usaually ending with me or him being hurt. That last one was a heart-breaker. 7 years ago? Still healing. I thought it was the most healthiest relationship I had EVER been in. And it was. Then he started working nights against my worries and wishes and it went downhill from there. Just COULD NOT STOP CRYING!!! Had to get on stupid Paxil, traded one bad thing for another, ugh!
22.My 19 year old chihuahua has me trained very well. Of course the9 yr old greeat dane takes orders form her very well also!
23. I am happy alone. I feel I have finally found out who I am. Who Kerri truly is and what she wants. Without having to please someone else, without having to act like someone else, without having to pretend to like something else. However, after all those relationships and having had someone there for me ALL THE TIME, after 7 years, I have actually felt, well, lonely! I’m shocked I just admitted that! Holy Cow! Wow! Yep, its for real, been feelin a bit lonely. Don’t get me wrong, keep the relationships, dont want em. Maybe I just need a hug?!
24. Never thought I’d be racking my brain so hard thinking about 25 daggom things to write about myself!!
25.I am truly blessed and honored to have met and be friends with Iyabo Asani. She has given my so much insight into so many things. Heck, even with this! Thank you, Iyabo, for being my being my friend.
Christopher on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 9:36 pm
I’ve seen these lists on Facebook and glad to see yours (and to get to know you better)!
Christopher’s last blog post..107-year-old: ‘Nothing but the Greatest!’ Day
Lindsay on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 10:58 pm
I loved reading about the things that make you unique. I just love you, lady! :0)
25 Random Judytoids | Dream and Flourish on Wed, 21st Jan 2009 11:19 pm
[...] Iyabo, Authentic Change Coach tagged me today on Twitter. I get to tell you 25 random things about myself, and tag 25 others to [...]
Tinu on Sat, 24th Jan 2009 2:06 pm
Tagger! I will get back with you.
Tinu’s last blog post..Tool Time Friday | Are you still squinting?
Trish Jones on Mon, 26th Jan 2009 9:23 am
Let me give you just 5 things about me you didn’t know … be warned, #5 could make me lose some friends!!
1. I smoked when I was 10 yrs old – that’s my excuse for being 5′0″ – It stunted my growth
2. I was raised with my Grandmother who was murdered in our home when I was 15 (see http://www.womenofinfluence.com).
3. When I was 10, I danced at The Royal Albert Hall, London as one of the Stylistics – flared trousers and all!! We danced and sang to “If I could, I’d like to be a great big movie star,” (”I’m Stone In Love With You”). Naturally no one in the audience thought the same – I expected someone to sponsor me that night! Also, I only just found out the Stylistics were the original artists for “Betcha By Golly Wow” I only knew the Lovers Rock reggae version which I probably played until the record was so scratched it was no good.
You should see me singing and dancing to it now! “And ever will my love for you keep growing strong …” Sad thing is, my hubby is downstairs so the reflection in the mirror’s getting his love which is okay with the reflection.
4. Before puberty played it’s evil on my body, I was so thin, my Grandma would take me to the Dr’s and complain about how skinny I was … If she could see me now, she’d be putting a lock on the kitchen door!
5. When I was 7 we had a cat called Doughal which was named after the dog of all things from “The Magic Roundabout.” One day as I played nicely with my cat, he bit me and I reacted by picking it up in my arms before sinking my teeth into it’s back. Did the cat screem! And did I get into trouble. How was I supposed to know … I was taught “tit for tat” and didn’t know the cat was excluded!
Trish Jones’s last blog post..WordPress.TV – Your Resource For Basic WordPress Training
Iyabo Asani on Mon, 26th Jan 2009 10:31 am
You guys are too hilarious. I have laughed and laughed. Just reading this list over again has me in stitches.
Kerrie, I had no idea you were adopted. You know I already love your father.
Trish, I am so glad that you only did five. I do not think the internet could take 25 of yours. You are entirely too much.
You actually bit the cat? Now I know where all your troubles come from! I thought I was bad.
Thank you guys for sharing. I really enjoyed this.